Question answering methods are well-known for leveraging data bias, such as the language prior in visual question answering and the position bias in machine reading comprehension (extractive question answering). Current debiasing methods often come at the cost of significant in-distribution performance to achieve favorable out-of-distribution generalizability, while non-debiasing methods sacrifice a considerable amount of out-of-distribution performance in order to obtain high in-distribution performance. Therefore, it is challenging for them to deal with the complicated changing real-world situations. In this paper, we propose a simple yet effective novel loss function with adaptive loose optimization, which seeks to make the best of both worlds for question answering. Our main technical contribution is to reduce the loss adaptively according to the ratio between the previous and current optimization state on mini-batch training data. This loose optimization can be used to prevent non-debiasing methods from overlearning data bias while enabling debiasing methods to maintain slight bias learning. Experiments on the visual question answering datasets, including VQA v2, VQA-CP v1, VQA-CP v2, GQA-OOD, and the extractive question answering dataset SQuAD demonstrate that our approach enables QA methods to obtain state-of-the-art in- and out-of-distribution performance in most cases. The source code has been released publicly in \url{https://github.com/reml-group/ALO}.
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